How was school today?,"Mother: “How was school today, Daniel?” Daniel: “It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!” Mother: “Ooh they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?” Daniel: “What school?”

A rich middle eastern oil tycoon sends his son to study in Germany... His son is feeling nervous about being alone abroad. So, his father allows him to take one of the golden plated Ferraris to Germany in order to boost his confidence. It is shipped over and the father hears nothing for the first few weeks from his son. Then, he recieves an email: "Father, I love the way the Ferrari drives but it's so embarrassing, all the other students take trains to school! What should I do? Your loving s…

When is a fetus viable? To a Christian, it's the moment of conception. To a Jew, it's when he graduates from medical school. -my mom heard this on the radio

Little Johnny knows his pills. Miss Paula is going around the classroom asking if the students know what pills take for what ails them. - Little Suzie, what do you take if you have a headache? Well, miss Paula, my mommy gives me Tylenol when I have a headache. - Good answer. James, what do you take if you have allergies? If I take Allegra, I stop sneezing, so that's what dad gives me. - Little Johnny, what do you take if you have diarrhea? Viagra. - Viagra? Why would you ever take that m…