God and Moses God and Moses were up in heaven when out of the blue Moses said God I really love heaven and find it really cool, but it is starting to get a bit boring up here. Why don't we go down to Earth and have some fun with the local girls down there? God looked at him sternly and said No way Moses, I did that 2000 years ago and they are still talking about it!

Moses snd Jesus are playing golf They come to a 210 yard par three that only a lake between tee and green. Jesus turns to Moses and asks what club would tiger woods use on this hole? Moses says Lord tiger would use a 4 iron but you should use a 3 wood. Jesus pulls a 4 iron and sure enough he ball lands in the water. Moses says I’ll take care of this. He walks to the edge of the lake parts the waters snd retrieves the ball. Once again Jesus ask what club would Tiger Woods use on this hole. Moses…

What do you call security guards for Samsung? Guardians of the galaxy

What did Moses use to cut the sea in half? A sea saw.