Two young lovers went up into the mountains for a romantic winter vacation. On arrival, the guy went out to chop some wood, but when he got back he complained that his hands were icy cold. "Okay," said his girlfriend, "put them here between my thighs and that will warm them up." So he did. After lunch, he went out to chop some more wood and again he came back complaining that his hands were freezing. "Just put them between my thighs," said his girlfriend, "and that will warm them up." So he did. After dinner, he went out to chop some more wood to get them through the night. When he came back, he said: "Honey, my hands are really, really freezing!" She looked at him and said: "For crying out loud, don't your ears ever get cold?" I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can hardly contain myself. Tim Vine