A group of third, fourth and fifth graders accompanied by two female teachers went on a field trip to the local racecourse to learn about thoroughbred racehorses. In the course of the tour some of the children wanted to go to the toilet, so it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher while the boys went with another. As the teacher assigned to the boys waited outside the men's toilet, one of the boys came out and told her that he couldn't reach the urinal. Reluctantly the teacher went inside and began hoisting the little boys up by their armpits, one by one. As she lifted one up by the armpits, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well-endowed for an elementary schoolchild. "I guess you must be in the fifth?" she said. "No, ma'am," he replied. "I'm in the seventh, riding Lucky Charm. Thanks for the lift anyway." The teacher at an English school stood in front of a map of the world. "Jack," she said, "can you show me where on this map America is?" Jack pointed correctly to America. "Now, Jenny," continued the teacher, "can you tell me the name of the person who discovered America?" Jenny said: "Jack just did, Miss." When I was at school, all the boys used to go and snog Julie Miller in the art cupboard. And you know, they don't make teachers like Julie Miller any more. Jason Manford