A woman phoned her local newspaper to ask if she could put a notice in the obituary column. "Certainly, ma'am," said the operator. "How much do funeral notices cost?" asked the woman. "Five dollars per word." "Good, do you have a paper and pencil handy?" "Yes, ma'am." "Write this then: 'Cohen died.'" "Sorry, ma'am, I forget to tell you: there's a five-word minimum." "Huh!" said the woman testily. "You certainly did forget to tell me that!" She thought for a moment and then said: "Okay. Got your pencil and paper?" "Yes, ma'am." "Right. Print this: 'Cohen died. Cadillac for sale.'"