Ned vs Ted Warning: This joke is meant to be told in person to keep friends busy. On a farm, twin race horses were born, Ned, who was older by 2 minutes, and younger brother Ted. Growing up they trained with each other and pushed each other to be the best they could. The day finally came when they were old enough for their first race. The announcer addresses the crowd, ""Aaandddd they're off. It's Ned, it's Ted, it's Ned, it's Ted, it's Ted, and it's Ned by a nose. Ted, disappointed by his loss …