A tour guide was showing a tourist around Washington, DC. The guide pointed out the spot where George Washington supposedly threw a dollar across the Potomac River. "That's impossible!" said the tourist. "No one could throw a dollar that far." "You have to remember," replied the guide, "that a dollar went a lot further in those days." Two guys were sitting in a bar, talking about their summer vacations. The first said: "My wife was so excited about going to the Grand Canyon, but when she eventua…