King Jokes

Three men get lost in a forest... Three men lost in the forest were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they passed a trial. The first step of the trial was to enter the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So, all three men went separate ways to gather fruits. The first one came back and said to the king, ""I brought ten strawberries."" The king then explained, ""Next, you have to shove all the fruits up your butt, or you'll be eat…

A Plain Cheerio is walking down the street... In the land of Cheerios when he sees a beautiful Strawberry Cheerio down the road. He asks the girl to marry him but she replies ""I can't marry a Plain Cheerio! The law says that I can only marry Cheerios of the same class."" So the Plain Cheerio runs to the king Cheerio and pleads him to let him become a Strawberry Cheerio. The king says ""You may only become a Strawberry Cheerio if you do something sweet for me."" The Plain Cheerio then gives the …

Three men who were lost in the forest were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they pass a trial. The first step of the trial was to go to the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So all three men went separate ways to gather fruits. The first one came back and said to the king, ""I brought ten apples."" The king then explained the trial to him. ""You have to shove the fruits up your butt without any expression on your face or you'l…

What do you get if King Kong falls down a mine shaft? A flat miner.

There was once a great Polynesian king He lived in a magnificent palace made of woven grass and sat on a beautiful throne. One day another kingdom gave him a gift: a new throne, even more exquisite than the one he already had. The king wanted to replace his old throne right away, but he didn't want to just throw it away; he had so many good memories tied to it! Instead, he had it moved to the attic, and then he proceeded to sit on his new throne. Unfortunately, since the palace was made of wo…

I made this joke! One day the king feels the urge to examine his castle dungeons and ensure everything is running smoothly. His examination is going well when he runs across the guy operating the rack. After a bit of conversation the king asks how the rack operator's job is going to which he replies "well, it's just one long 'knight' after another."

Three guys are stranded on an island populated with cannibals. The king of the cannibals tells them that there is a way to get out of the island if they accomplish a certain task. So the king says to the three men, "Collect ten of any single type of fruit and bring them to me." The three men quickly get to work and starts looking for fruits. The first man that returns has 10 bananas and offers them to the king. But the king tells him, "It's not over yet. You are to insert all the fruits i…

A husband went to the sheriff’s department to report that his wife was missing. A husband went to the sheriff’s department to report that his wife was missing. Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home. Sergeant: What is her height? Husband: Gee, I’m not sure. A little over five-feet tall. Sergeant: Weight? Husband: Don’t know. Not slim, not really fat. Sergeant: Color of eyes? Husband: Never noticed. Sergeant: Color of hair? Husband: Changes a couple times…

A husband went to the sheriff's department to report that his wife was missing. Husband went to the sheriff's department to report that his wife was missing. Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home... Sergeant: What is her height? Husband: Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall. Sergeant: Weight? Husband: Don't know. Not slim, not really fat. Sergeant: Color of eyes? Husband: Sort of brown I think. Never really noticed. Sergeant: Color of …

A husband went to the sheriff’s department to report that his wife was missing Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home. Sergeant: What is her height? Husband: Gee, I’m not sure. A little over five-feet tall. Sergeant: Weight? Husband: Don’t know. Not slim, not really fat. Sergeant: Color of eyes? Husband: Never noticed. Sergeant: Color of hair? Husband: Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown. Sergeant: What was she wearing? Husband: Coul…

Missing Wife - Husband went to the sheriff's department to report that his wife was missing. - Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home... - Sergeant: What is her height? - Husband: Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall. - Sergeant: Weight? - Husband: Don't know. Not slim, not really fat. - Sergeant: Color of eyes? - Husband: Sort of brown I think. Never really noticed. - Sergeant: Color of hair? - Husband: Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dar…

A king sits on his throne. Suddenly, one of his knights enters. The knight looks so tired he can barely stand. His armour is heavily battered and covered with dust, his sword is notched, his helmet is cracked... **King**: Dear God, John! What happened to you? **Knight**: Oh, I've been hard at work lately, Your Majesty. A heavy blow I dealt against your enemies to the north. **King**: What? John, but I have *no* enemies to the north! **Knight**: Really? (*thinks for a moment*) Oh well, you d…

Two men are poaching in the rainforest when they're caught by an indigenous tribe. The tribe takes the men to the tribal leaders who hold a court. The tribal king says

Lost in Jungle Three men who were lost in the jungle were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they pass a trial.

There were three men who were lost in the forest. They were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they pass the trial. The first step of the trial was to go into the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So all three men went separate ways to gather fruits.