Helens Jokes

Got an email from my school principal today. This is its content. IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from students, it will be our policy to keep all students well taught through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TEACHING. (S.H.I.T) We are attempting to give our students more S.H.I.T than other schools. If the board feels that you do not receive your fair share of S.H.I.T on the course, you will be immediately placed on the priority…

Chili Cook Off {this TRULY should be a repost, but if not, enjoy...} Notes From An Inexperienced Chili Taster Named FRANK, who was visiting Texas from the East Coast: "Recently I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that …

Texas Chili Cookoff Notes From An Inexperienced Chili Tester Named FRANK, who was visiting Texas from the East Coast: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions to the beer wagon when the call came. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy, and besides, they told me I could have …