Avoid cars that have a sign saying 'baby on board'. That driver has only had a couple of hours sleep and is likely to be suicidal.

Unless you're a toddler heading towards traffic I'm not running after you.

Catch a baby opossum, give it a 12-hr sedative, and hide it in the glove compartment of the car of the person who's dating your ex.

Hell hath no fury like a toddler wants to "do it herself." Three hours later, I'm still waiting for her to get out of the car.