WIFE: you forgot to run the dishwasher again, didn't you? ME: [drinking milk from a flower vase] no, why?#Marriage#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
I'm only watching the royal wedding for the bishop. I've always wanted to see a person who only moves diagonally.#Marriage#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
My wife reads two books a week and I just told my son that an idiom is a group of idiots.#Marriage#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Kobe Bryant's Wife filing for divorce. I bet somewhere right now Kim Kardashian is plotting..#Kobe Bryants#Kim Kardashian#Marriage#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
*wakes up to wife and son screaming* me: What are you guys yelling about? them: YOU'RE DRIVING#Marriage#Driving#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp