When my mom first saw my Facebook she was offended it said I was "interested in men" I think because she thought that was a list of hobbies

Facebook made billions by saying "Hey, remember that kid you haven't seen since the third grade? He's a parent who hates Obama now."

Facebook has a link to "Report a Problem" so I wrote "I'm not very close with my father." Now we wait I guess

*dad bursts into my room and puts me in a headlock* "Why didn't you 'Like' the Grumpy Cat meme I posted on Facebook, you son of a bitch?"