Spider-Man, hanging right in front of your face when you turn on the bathroom light.

What idiot named him Spider-Man instead of Peter Parkour?

Spider-Man is my favorite superhero whose name is made up of 2 things that scare the shit out of me.

Dave is coming over. "Dave Wilson or Dave who thinks he's Spider-Man?" [loud thud on the roof] BACK DOOR IS OPEN, DAVE