I'm glad David married me for my brains. My glorius, perky, bouncy brains.

"David you're late again!" "Sorry boss.." [cut to: me running on all fours through a forest chasing deer] "...traffic"

The real reason David beat Goliath is that when David threw a rock, Goliath threw scissors.

*admires David at the museum* I can't believe a teenage mutant ninja turtle sculpted this