It's depressing to think how much more Dora the Explorer has seen and done in her life compared to mine

I bet Columbus was super pissed when he rolled up in the Santa Maria only to find Dora had already explored America.

Tell me how Dora can be completely bilingual at the age of five, but can't find a stupid apple on a tree behind her?

I don't like the Man I become when I answer Dora before my toddler does