When I was a child, I wanted to be a surgeon. But apparently I was too young!!

Every time you hire a clown for a kid's birthday party, a therapist gets a new car.

Ppl at Starbucks are weird. They love it when I bring our chihuahua in a little baby stroller, but get all freaked out when I let him nurse.

Why would you name your human child Hunter? Hunter is a profession. That's like naming your kid Dentist.