My haunted house would be one where guys jump out w your tax forms improperly filled out & others handing you phones with your mom on hold.

I'm dreaming of getting rich like my father. Wow your dad must be a rich man. No, he too is dreaming of getting rich.

Billy: Hi! What's your name? Johnny: Johnny. B: Hey, what's THAT? J: An iPhone 4. Mom: Who's your new friend, Billy? B: Johnny. He's poor.

Me: I found a job! Mom: That's great! What is it? Me: debt collection! Mom:.... Me..... Mom:... Me: I think you know why I'm calling.