"..,you will die in seven days" *creepy voice on the phone* Me; "new phone, who dis?"

Her; My phones dead let me use yours Me; (throws phone out car window) oh I must of left it at home

[pulling the casket a few inches away from the wall during a funeral] sorry just need to plug in my phone for a minute

Responding as if you've just been wrongfully accused of murder when someone on the phone asks if you're still in bed