Me: Define Illegal Cop: You're drunk, riding a horse, shooting a gun and yelling 'For Narnia' Me: I want my lawyer.

Apparently, "I judge a great wine by its alcohol content", doesn't impress wine snobs

C, Eb, and G walk into a ""bar"" The bartender says, ""Sorry, but we don't serve minors"" So E-Flat leaves and C and G have an open 5th between them. After a few drinks the 5th is diminished and the G is out flat. An F comes in and tries to augment the situation but is not sharp enough. A D comes into the bar and heads straight for the bathroom saying,*Excuse me, I'll just be a second"" An A comes into the bar but the bartender is not convinced this realtive of C is not a minor. Then the bartend…

A Jew, A Christian, A Lawyer, A Doctor, A Blonde, and a Biker walk into a bar........ the bartender goes ""what is this some kind of joke or something?!""