I used to complain about crying babies on airplanes but last week I was flying, both pilots died & a crying baby landed us on a soccer field

If a soccer player falls in the forest and nobody is there to see it, do they still flail their arms and cry and act like a big dumb baby?

You kick one baby and everyone's like "That's not a football" and "He's not breathing, call 911." Draaaaaama.

A modern recasting of Moses floating down a river in a wicker basket but it's a soccer mom forgetting her baby on the roof of her van.