Just once...one time; can't we buy a tree that doesn't try to attack me when I come home drunk at 2am.#Bar#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Me: Define Illegal Cop: You're drunk, riding a horse, shooting a gun and yelling 'For Narnia' Me: I want my lawyer.#Animals#Lawyer#Police#Bar+1 more0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Beer makes me feel invincible. Vodka makes me feel innvienceablrerrer. *falls down*#Bar#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
I feel a weird sense of pride when I'm so drunk that autocorrect just gives up.#Bar#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp