😄 Me: I'll have a beer Waiter: it's 10am Me: I'll have a beer and some scrambled eggs

Me: I'll have a beer Waiter: it's 10am Me: I'll have a beer and some scrambled eggs

Joke ID: 01KKTNKG5DSVFEDVRTTQXJ3CZH

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Me: Define Illegal Cop: You're drunk, riding a horse, shooting a gun and yelling 'For Narnia' Me: I want my lawyer.

Beer makes me feel invincible. Vodka makes me feel innvienceablrerrer. *falls down*

Old enough to know better, but still too drunk to care.

I feel a weird sense of pride when I'm so drunk that autocorrect just gives up.