Wife: I finally caught you. I could hear it from the other room. You were watching a dirty movie. Me: No. Its just womens tennis.

Me: Do you love me? 13: Silence Husband: if you don't tell your mother you love her we are going to make out at your next soccer game.

Me: "This new flavour of Pringles is horrible." Wife: "You're eating a tube of tennis balls."

To the woman that told her husband to "bite my ballsack" at the store today,I golf clapped because you won life.