Sent on a golf tour in Newfoundland, Tiger Woods drives his new Ford Fusion into a petrol station in a remote part of the countryside. The pump attendant, obviously knows nothing about golf, greets him in a typical Newfoundlander manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is. ""How's ya gettin' on today, sir"" says the attendant. Tiger nods a quick ""hello"" and bends forward to pick up the nozzle. As he does so, two tees fall out of his shirt pocket onto the ground. ""What are dose?"" Ask…

My ""99 Problems"" Parody If you're having computer problems I feel sorry for you son, he's got 99 viruses and AIDS aint one. If you're having car problems I feel sorry for you son, I've got 99 Ferraris and a Ford aint one. If you're having girl problems I feel sorry for you son, I got 99 women and a dyke aint one. If you're having heatstroke I feel sorry for you son, it's 99 degrees out and he wishes it were 1. If you can't win at football I feel sorry for you son, I got 99 yards cus that bitch…

I turn into a Mexican soccer announcer when in driving in traffic GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Dear @Ford what about an f-150 you could drive standing up in the bed like the truck was a boat