Financial planning Roy was a single guy, living at home with his father and working in the family business. When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a wife with which to share his fortune. One evening at an investment meeting he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away. ""I may look like just an ordinary man,"" he said to her, but in just a few years, my father will die, and I'll inheri…

A lazy son's father comes home... ... And tells him son, who is laying on the couch all day:""Son, I talked to one of my friends and I have managed to get you a job!"" ""But dad..."" says his son ""I don't want to work, it's way too hard."". His father respons:""That's the good thing about it! It's the easiest job ever: You will work as a security guard at the old cemetery. All you have to do is sit behind the gate and wait till 4 o'clock and you will also get a lot of money for it."". ""Well...…

Good Night, Good Bye A father put his three year old daughter to bed, told her a story and listened to her prayers - which she ended by saying ""God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless Grandma, and good-bye Grandpa."" The father said, ""Why did you say good-bye to Grandpa?"" The little girl said, ""I don't know, Daddy, it just seemed like the thing to do."" The next day Grandpa died. The father thought it was a strange coincidence. A few months later the father put the girl to bed and listen…

Proto-9/11 humor Okay I originally posted this in an r/AskReddit thread. This one's got a bit of a back story... My dad used to work at a bank in NYC trading currencies back in the 70s/80s. He was in the office one day when the electronic scrolling marquee in the office read ""The Space Shuttle Challenger exploded 90 seconds after take-off: All onboard presumed dead"", before going blank for 15 minutes. The board would usually be scrolling figures and prices all day long and it just went blank. …