Two guys are hiking in the woods... Two guys are hiking in the woods when one gets bit on the asscheek by a snake. His friend calls 911 and asks what to do. The responder says to put his mouth on the bite and suck the venom out. He promptly hangs up the phone and his friend says ""what did they say"" He replies, ""You're gonna die buddy""

Two bunnies are walking in the woods...... Two bunnies are walking in the woods. They're approached by a large bear. The bear says, ""Do you guys have any problems with crap sticking to your fur?"" Bunny #1 says to bunny #2, ""Back away very slowly...... I know how this joke ends!""

Two hunters in the woods Two hunters are in the woods. The first says ""man I really need to crap but I didn't bring any toilet paper"" the second hunter says ""don't you have a dollar or something in your wallet?"" Hunter 1 says ""oh yea I'll be back"" 10 or so minutes pass and the first hunter finally comes back with crap all over his hands. Hunter 2 says ""what happened?!?"" Hunter 1 "" you try wiping with 3 quarters 2 dimes and a nickel""

Walking in the woods... Two blondes were walking through the woods, when they came upon a set of tracks. ""Those are rabbit tracks!"" Said the fist one. ""No they're not! They're bear tracks!"" ""Rabbit tracks!"" ""Bear tracks!"" ""Rabbit!"" ""Bear!"" They argued like this untill the train hit them.