[Wildebeest being lowered Mission Impossible-style from a helicopter to graze the grasses of Buckingham Palace]

David Cameron: "In some parts of Britain there are three generations of families where nobody has ever worked." Buckingham Palace?

My mate John knows everyone in the world Just cross-posting this from over on /r/AskReddit My mate John claims to know everyone in the world. Last week, we were in the pub, and he was bragging about it. ""Not everyone, though, John!"" I said. He said ""Wait a minute"", pulled out his phone, and made a call. Next thing you know, we're in a taxi on the way to Buckingham Palace. We pull up outside, the guard waves us through, saying ""Hi John!"", and we stop at the front door. Prince Phillip answer…

Did you hear about the Barcelona football star who got busted for tax evasion? They said his tax returns were Messi.