It feels like Obama's been on tour longer than The Rolling Stones.

Yesterday I watched Rogue One, featuring a cameo from Carrie Fisher. One hour later she was dead. So today I'll be watching Home Alone 2.

Home Loan Troubles So one day Kermit the frog decides that he wanted to buy this new condo by the beach. He goes into the nearest bank and strolls up to the counter. In front of him there was this teller with name badge blaring ""Paddywhack"". Kermit says ""I want a loan"". She goes through usual procedure then asks him about a deposit. He places this little tiny china elephant on the bench and says ""Here's my deposit, give me a loan"". The teller replies ""I'm sorry that's really not good enou…

Carrie Fisher runs into George Micheal in the afterlife... She says, ""Oh man, I'm a huge fan! I've got every one of your albums except the first one."" He says, ""I find your lack of 'Faith' disturbing"".