Me: Go to bed 5-year-old: One more question Me: Fine 5: Who would win if Luke Skywalker fought Harry Potter? Me 5: Me: Get some coffee

A spider crawled on my son's hand today. I did what any father would do. I mean, Luke Skywalker seems like a productive member of society.

"Owen, you must hide this baby, at all costs, from Anakin Skywalker." "Okay. Should we continue to call him Luke Skywalker?" "Seems fine."

If I were Luke Skywalker it would have taken me about six minutes to turn R2-D2 into a bong.