Donald Trump's first act in office will probably be to illegalize all shredded cheese. He will Make America Grate Again.

The night after taking office, Donald Trump's deal with the Satan has been completed, and he dies, arriving in hell... Well, one can hope, anyway.

Hilary Clinton and Donald Trump in a hot air balloon Hilary invites Donald on a bury the hatchet secret meeting before the knives come out in the run up. A little while into the trip she springs a surprise on the other President hopeful.. "" So Trump.. I would like you to say hello to our pilot, Pedro who happens to be Mexican, and my assistant, who happens to be a photographer. "" Before Donald has the chance to react the flame feeding the huge balloon keeping them in the sky starts to flicker …

Donald Trump and his chauffeur are driving on a country road. Suddenly, a pig runs in front of the car. The chauffeur has no time to react, and runs over it, giving it instant death. The chauffeur stops the car, gets out and looks around. He spots a small farm-house in the distance. Donald says to his chauffeur, ""You should at least tell them that you've killed the pig"" The chauffeur does as he's told. A couple of hours later, the chauffeur stumbles out of the farmhouse, covered in lipstick ki…