An Australian ventriloquist visiting Afghanistan, walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog. He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the villager ""can I talk to your dog?"" Villager: ""The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Aussie."" Ventriloquist: ""Hello dog, how's it going mate?"" Dog: ""Doin' all right."" Villager: (look of extreme shock) Ventriloquist: ""Is this villager your owner?"" (pointing at the villager) Dog: ""Yep"" Ventriloquist: ""How does he treat you?"" Dog: ""Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play."" Villager: (look of utter disbelief) Ventriloquist: ""Mind if I talk to your horse?"" Villager: ""Uh, the horse doesn't talk either....I think."" Ventriloquist: ""Hey horse, how's it going?"" Horse: ""Cool"" Villager: (absolutely dumbfounded) Ventriloquist: ""Is this your owner?"" (pointing at the villager) Horse: ""Yep"" Ventriloquist: ""How does he treat you?"" Horse: ""Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."" Villager: (total look of amazement) Ventriloquist: ""Mind if I talk to your goat?"" Villager: (in a panic) ""The goat's a liar!""