A cash bar on parent / teacher interview nights would be a great fundraiser for schools.

[parent/teacher meeting] "you must've read to him as a baby" *leans forward in little desk* lady, I didn't even know him when I was a baby

[school teacher job interview] Can I ask you some questions? I don't know CAN you? haha impressive [stands] welcome aboard!

Coworker: Stop Me: collaborate and listen Coworker: Don't Me: you forget about me Coworker: Hey! Me: teacher, leave them kids alone