Hellen Keller walks into a bar... She now has a bruise on her forehead...

Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And then a table, and then a stool.

Me: Define Illegal Cop: You're drunk, riding a horse, shooting a gun and yelling 'For Narnia' Me: I want my lawyer.

Beer makes me feel invincible. Vodka makes me feel innvienceablrerrer. *falls down*