Let's ask ISIS to be our Valentine Little Thelma comes home from first grade and tells her father that they learned about the history of Valentine's Day. ""Since Valentine's Day is for a Christian saint and we're Jewish,"" she asks, ""Will God get mad at me for giving someone a valentine? Thelma's father thinks a bit then says ""No, I don't think God would get mad. Who do you want to give a valentine to?"" ""The whole ISIS group,"" she says. ""Why them,"" her father asks in shock? ""Well,"" she says, ""I thought that if a little American Jewish girl could have enough love to give them a valentine, they might start to think that maybe we're not all bad, and maybe start loving people a little bit. And if other kids saw what I did and then they sent valentines to them, they'd love everyone a lot. And then they'd start going all over the place telling everyone how much they loved them and how they didn't hate anyone anymore."" Her father's heart swells and he looks at his daughter with new found pride. ""Thelma, that's the most wonderful thing I've ever heard."" ""I know,"" Thelma says, ""and once that gets them out in the open, the Marines could blast the shit out of them.""