The miser's will A notorious miser died, and in his will he left his $3 million estate split evenly among his three sons: a doctor, a priest, and a lawyer. Being selfish even in death, he left each of them strict instructions to put the money in his coffin when they buried him. After the funeral, the three were talking, and the doctor said ""I have a confession to make. I didn't actually put all the money in the coffin -- it seemed like such a waste. I kept out $200,000 to buy some new equipment…

A doctor and his wife were having lunch... ...and a beautiful young woman walks by and winks at the doctor suggestively. She cooes, ""How's it goin', doc?"" and walks away, hips swaying. The wife, confused, asks, ""Who was that, dear?"" The doctor took a sip of his wine and said casually, ""That's my mistress Arielle."" The wife was shocked and in tears. ""I can't believe you're cheating on me! I'm going to divorce you and take everything you have, you lying bastard!"" The husband calmly puts hi…

A one-way trip to Mars NASA was interviewing professionals to be sent to Mars. Only one could go and couldn't return to Earth. The first applicant, an engineer, was asked how much he wanted to be paid for going. ""A million dollars,"" he answered, ""because I want to donate it to M.I.T."" The next applicant, a doctor, was asked the same question. He asked for $2 million. ""I want to give a million to my family,"" he explained, ""and leave the other million for the advancement of medical research…

30 grand A man had $30,000 and was about to die, so he hired a doctor, preacher, and lawyer. The man told the three when I die each of you throw $10,000 of my money in my grave with me. So the man died and they did. Months later the doctor confessed, I only threw $7,000. I used $3,000 for medical research. Then the preacher confessed I only threw in $8,000. I used $2,000 for church repairs. Then the lawyer said I'm ashamed of you two. I wrote a check for the full $10,000 and threw it in.