Me: So if I call Canada it's billed as international? Phone rep: Yes. Cuz Canada is a country. Me: You should hear how ridiculous you sound.

Not sure if this is the right place to post, but after the US election results from last night, I need help creating a new dating website. It will help desperate American men and women find love in Canada. It'll be called ehHarmony

It sure is hot down here! The Johnsons from Canada decide to head to Florida, staying at the same hotel they honeymooned at for their 20th anniversary. However, due to their last minute decision, both have too take separate flights. When the husband arrives, he immediately emails his wife (Joanne) but in his haste he mistypes her email address. Meanwhile, somewhere in San Antonio, Joan Johnson is returning home from her husband's funeral, he was a pastor who had died suddenly from a heart attack…

What was the internet speed in Canada in the 1990's? 56eh.