Bruce Willis, Chuck Norris and Arnold Schwarzenegger are all auditioning for a film about composers... Bruce Willis says ""I'll be Mozart"", Chuck Norris says ""I'll be Beethoven"" and Arnold Schwarzenegger says ""I'll be Bach"".

A director decides that he's going to make a movie based on the lives of famous classical composers. Looking for a prospective cast, he asks Sylvester Stallone which composer he would like to play in the movie. Stallone thinks for a moment and says, ""I like Mozart. Let me be Mozart."" The director then turns to Arnold Schwarzenegger and asks him who he'd like to play. Arnold replies, ""I'll be Bach!""

Sylvester Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Dam, and Arnold Schwarzenegger So one day, Sylvester Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Dam, and Arnold Schwarzenegger were sitting together in a bar, kicking back, drinking a few brews, talking about life and talking about the roles they'd played in movies. As the three men talked, each was surprised to realize that all three of them had grown tired of playing the action hero- shooting the bad guys, pulling off life-threatening stunts, and getting the girl in the en…

So there's this school play... Sylvester Stallone, Chuck Norris, and Arnold Schwarzenegger have to put on a play featuring their favorite musical composers. They each toil over who they will play, until the next day they meet. Stallone goes first. "I'll be Mozart" Next up is Chuck Norris. "I'll be Beethoven". Happy that no one picked his composer, Arnold announces "I'll be Bach".