A police officer pulls up to a stop sign with a beaten up Toyota Camry in front of him. The officer comes to a stop and waits, but the Camry refuses to move. The officer waits a minute and begins to get agitated. Finally, the officer gets out of the police car and walks up to the Camry. The window creaks open, and the officer is hit with the overwhelming scent of weed. The officer yells ""What the hell are you waiting for, son?!"" The driver turns to the cop and says ""Sorry, officer, I was wait…

"Is that a car alarm going off? Someone must be trying to steal it I better call the police!" - literally no one ever

Cop: Know why I stopped you? The dead guy in my trunk? Cop: Um, speeding, but my shift's over, so proper burial and no more murders. Ok?

Officer: "didn't you know that sleeping in your car on the side of the road is illegal ?" Me: "yes I did officer. But this isn't my car"