An farmer walks in to a lawyer's office in Alabama... And he says to the lawyer, ""Sir, I'd like to get a divorce."" To which the lawyer says, ""Well, do you have a suit?"" ""Yes, I sure do"", the man replies. ""Wear it to church every Sunday."" ""That's not what I mean. Do you have a case?"" ""No, you see I've always been a John Deere man myself. Never had a Case in my life."" ""Sir, do you have any issues with your wife. Did she cheat on you, is she a niggard?"" To which the farmer replies, ""…

A Farmer goes to town and enters a lawyer's office. "Mr. Lawyer," he says, "I'd like to get one of them die-vorces." "Well," replies the lawyer, "do you have any grounds?" "Yessir, 'bout 180 acres out near the county line." "No, what I meant was, do you have a case?" "Naw, but I do have a John Deere." "No, No, No, do you have a grudge?" "Yup, park my John Deere in it evry night." "Look here, do you have a suit?" "'Course, wear it to church evry Sunday." "You're not making this easy on…

A lawyer is meeting the devil to make a deal ... and says, "Alright, I want to win my next 10 cases in a row, for settlements of no less than $1 million!" The Devil replies, "Ok mister lawyer, but in return, I demand the souls of your wife and child for 1000 years!" The lawyer scratches his head and says, "I don't get it, where's the catch?" From my dad.

Redneck Divorce A hillbilly walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for divorce. Attorney: "May I help you?" Hillbilly: "Yea, I want to get one of those dayvorces". Attorney: "Well do you have any grounds?" Hillbilly: "Yea, I got about a hundred acres." Attorney: "No, you don't understand, do you have a case?" Hillbilly: "No, I don't have a Case, but I have a John Deere." Attorney: "I mean, do you have a grudge?" Hillbilly: "Yea, I got a grudge. That's where I park my John Deer…