Waiter Jokes. Customer: Waiter there's a fly in my soup. Waiter: Gee...look's like it's doin' the backstroke. Customer: Waiter there's a fly in my soup. Waiter: Don't worry sir, we don't charge for extra ingredients. Customer: Waiter, there's a DEMON in my soup. Waiter: Well sir, you said you wanted your soup HOT AS HELL. Customer: Waiter there's a fly in my soup. Waiter: Look sir, how much soup can a fly drink? Customer: Waiter there's a large footprint in the middle of my omelet. Waiter: Well sir, you did say,""I want a large omelet and step on it!"" Customer: Waiter, you must have a very CLEAN KITCHEN. Waiter: Why??? Customer: Everything tastes like soap. Customer: Waiter there's a fly in my soup. Waiter: Wait a minute while I get my pet frog. Customer: Waiter there's a frog in my soup. Waiter: That's because were out of flies. Customer: Waiter, this food tastes absolutely horrible. Where's the manager? Waiter: He's having his dinner at another restaurant. Customer: Waiter there's a fly in my soup. Waiter: Not to worry sir, that spider on your bread will soon get him. Customer: Waiter, this coffee is disgusting - it tastes like earth. Waiter: Well sir, it was only ground yesterday. Customer: Waiter, bring me something to eat and make it snappy. Waiter: How about a crocodile sandwich? Customer: Waiter, is there soup on the menu? Waiter: No, I just wiped it off. Customer: Waiter, this egg is bad. Waiter: Don't blame me, I only laid the table. Customer: Waiter there's a fly in my soup. Waiter: Sir, what so you expect for 50 cents, a beetle? Customer: Waiter there's a slug in my salad. Waiter: Sorry sir. I didn't realize you were vegetarian. Customer: Waiter there's a fly in my custard. Waiter: Wait a moment, sir, I'll fetch him a spoon. Customer: Waiter there's a fly in my soup. Waiter: Of course it is sir, just a moment ago you said it was a maggot. Customer: Waiter there's a maggot in my soup. Waiter: Wait for it to turn into a fly, and it'll fly off by itself. Customer: what's this frog leg doing in my soup? Waiter: It must be because of our new french chef - he doesn't speak a word of english. Customer: There's a slug in my salad. Waiter: Sir, I already told you, NO PETS ALLOWED! Customer: Whats this Mexican doing in my chilli? Waiter: What did you expect - a China-man? Customer: Is this fish fresh? Waiter: I don't know. Why don't you ask it? Customer: Waiter this lamb chop is pretty tough. Waiter: that's because it's a year old, and we ran out of tenderizer.