I finally realised why Oscar Pistorius lost his trial Because from a legal point he didn't have a leg to stand on.

Me: Define Illegal Cop: You're drunk, riding a horse, shooting a gun and yelling 'For Narnia' Me: I want my lawyer.

If you roll out your chapstick more than an inch, I'll see you in court.

what does the Bible say about faking your own death to get out of jury duty