The Three Randies Three friends have gotten together for their weekly drinks and chat and they are all discussing their new boyfriends. By coincidence, all three of the boyfriends are named ""Randy"". This, of course, causes confusion as to which Randy they are discussing. The friends decide to give their boyfriends nicknames so as to avoid confusion, and decide to name their beaus after various soda pops. Friend #1 says ""I'm gonna call my boyfriend Randy Seven-Up, because he's got seven inches…

Comparing men to drinks A group of ladies were comparing their husbands to various beverages. The first decided her husband was Mountain Dew. First he mounts, then he do. The second states hers has to be 7-Up since it takes 7 hours for him to 'get up'. The third declared Crush because he only did it missionary position. The fourth opted for Squirt since that's what he did as soon as she stripped off. The last wife, after much thought said her husband had to be Jack Daniels. The others looked on …

I'm seeing a lot of blonde jokes, so here's mine. A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde were talking about their boyfriends and decided they wanted to give them nicknames. The brunette says, ""I'll name mine 7-Up because he is 7 inches and always up for me."" The redhead says, ""I'll name mine Mountain Dew because he always wants to mount and dew me."" The blonde thinks for a moment and says, ""I'll name my boyfriend Jack Daniels. He's a hard liquor.""

The night before the wedding The bride-to-be and her bridesmaids were giggling over tequila and strawberry daiquiris at the bachelorette party. The maid of honor started a game of truth or dare. "If your boyfriend were a soda, what would he be?" she slurred at the other bridesmaid. "7-Up, because he's got seven inches and he can keep it up. What about you?" "Mountain Dew. He knows how to mount and do me. And what about the future Mrs. Johnson? What kind of soda is Matt?" "Jack Daniels," sa…