The Purina Diet Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Necco, the Wonder Dog, which weighs 191 lbs. I was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had..an elephant? So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds …

A man loves tractors There was a man who loves tractors, he had hundreds of model tractors, had a job maintaining and fixing tractors, and owned many tractors himself. He also had a wife, and like him, she loved tractors, together they were very happy with each other and their tractors. One day the couple were driving along the road when they passed a big farm delivery truck carrying tractors when one rolled off the delivery truck and hit their car. The wife had to be hospitalized due to her inj…

How to keep wife And Husband happy How to keep wife happy . . . .! It's really not difficult to make a wife happy. A husband only needs to be: 1. a friend 2. a companion 3. a lover 4. a brother 5. a father 6. a man 7. a chef 8. an electrician 9. a carpenter 10. a plumber 11. a mechanic 12. a decorator 13. a stylist 14. a charmer 15. a gynecologist 16. a psychologist 17. a bug exterminator 18. a psychiatrist 19. a healer 20. a good listener 21. an organizer 22. a good father 23. Very clean 24. Sy…

The dogfood diet (don't know the source, my dad sent me this he prob heard it on the radio) Yesterday I was at my local Publix buying a large bag of Purina Dog Chow for my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog, and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think...I had an elephant? So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I…