military jokes ""When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."" --U.S. Marine Corps ""Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."" --USAF Ammo Troop ""If the enemy is in range, so are you."" --Infantry Journal ""A slipping gear could let your m203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."" --Army's magazine of prevention maintenance ""It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed."" --U.S. Air Force manual ""Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo."" --Infantry Journal ""Tracers work both ways."" --U.S. Army Ordnance ""Five-second fuses only last three seconds."" --Infantry Journal ""Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."" --David Hackworth ""If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush."" --Infantry Journal ""No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection."" --Joe Gay ""Any ship can be a minesweeper....once."" --Anon ""Never tell the platoon sergeant you have nothing to do."" --Unknown Marine Recruit ""Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."" --Infantry Journal ""If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him."" --USAF Ammo Troop