My girlfriend's car got stolen today, so if you see a man driving a dark green Honda Civic, PLEASE tell him I left some Skittles in there.

What was the point in making your car louder, bro? Do you really want women to turn their heads and notice you drive a 1999 Honda Civic?

According to the Bible, what company was the first car manufacturer? Honda. Because Jesus and his apostles were in one accord.

A young guy from Nebraska moves to Florida and goes to a big ""everything under one roof"" department store looking for a job. The Manager says, ""Do you have any sales experience?"" The kid says, ""Yeah. I was a salesman back in Omaha."" Well, the boss liked the kid and gave him the job. ""You start tomorrow."" I'll come down after we close and see how you did."" His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the boss came down. ""How many customers bo…