😄 My wife just gave me an ultimatum, it's either her or Facebook. So sadly, this will be my last joke....

A fun thing to do is comment "that ain't the girl you were with at the bar the other night" on all my married friends Facebook family photos

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Facebook: Hey remember this pic of your dog that died? Me: Damnit Facebook not now. FB: Sorry... FB: Your ex girlfriend is getting married.

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"Playing hard to get huh?" I say as I flip through your wedding photos on facebook.

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I could care less about you but I'm still going to go through your entire wedding & 1st born childs photo album on Facebook. I hate myself

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