Monica Lewinsky was walking on the beach when she found a lantern washed up on the shore. She started to rub it and out popped a genie. ""Oh goodie, now I will get three wishes!"" she exclaimed. ""No,"" said the genie, ""You have been very bad recently, and because of this, I can only give you one wish."" ""Let's see,"" says Monica, ""I don't need fame, because I have plenty of that due to all of the media coverage. And I don't need money, because after I write my book, and do all my interviews, I'll have all the money I could ever want. But, I would like to get rid of these love handles, though. Yes, that's it, for my one wish I would like my love handles removed."" ""Poof!"" And just like that... her ears were gone.