Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer It's too bad Chuck Norris never cries

Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris had AIDS. Then he said, 'Do you not know who I am?' Chuck has been AIDS-free ever since.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ......All of it.