So this cop was writing a parking ticket. I went to the store the other day. I was only in there for about 5 minutes, and when I came out there was a motorcycle cop writing a parking ticket. So I went up to him and said, ""Come on buddy, how about giving a guy a break?"" He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. So I call him a stupid idiot. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having bald tires! The I really got angry at him. He finished the second ticket and put it on t…

A joke I heard on a Townes Van Zandt album. I guess maybe NSFW? Paraphrased a bit. I doubt Mr. Van Zandt would mind, and god knows who he heard it. A cop is out walking the streets in a little town one night when he comes across a drunk man. The drunk is stumbling around the sidewalk back and forth like he's looking for something. Cop asks ""What're you looking for buddy?"" The guy slurs ""My car, officer, they took my car!"" The cop decides to play along because it's been a slow night. ""Alrigh…

Two black guys were walking down the road in Los Angeles.... When they were hit by a police car driven by a drunk cop. One guy was thrown through the windscreen and his buddy was sent hurling down an embankment. The first guy was charged with breaking and entering, and the second was charged with leaving the scene of an accident. (I'm not racist but I laughed at this so hard.)

WHAT WE LEARN FROM THE MOVIES -- It is always possible to park directly in front of any building you are visiting. -- A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty. -- If you start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps. -- Most laptops are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization. -- It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts, your enemies will wait pa…