X-Post from /r/Standup: If I ever got on stage I'd give my version of the Teletubbies... Here's my skit on the Teletubbies. So I hate the Teletubbies. It's one of the most mindless children's shows I've ever seen. I sometimes had to watch it because my ex's nephew loved the show and when we baby sat him that's all he wanted to watch. To me all it is, is a bunch of weird looking giant different colored babies dancing around on an acid trip, with dumb shapes on their heads. How is this informative…

Some musician related jokes Why can't a clarinet player keep a girlfriend? Whenever they start talking dirty, his voice cracks. Why can't a French horn player keep a girlfriend? Whenever they start making out, his hand goes to the wrong place. What do you call a euphonium player who isn't part of a military band? Unemployed How many tuba players does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, one to hold it in place and the other to play pedal tones until the world starts to spin. A 6th grader d…

A LESSON IN MORALS One day at the end of class, little Johnny's teacher asks the class to go home and think of a story to be concluded with the moral of that story. The following day the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell their story. Little Suzy raises her hand. "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road." When …

Majedar Chutkule: हंसने के चेहरे पर रौनक आती है और माइंड से लेकर मूड तक फ्रेश रहता है. अगर आप अकेला महसूस कर रहे हैं या फिर बोर हो रहे हैं तो पढ़िए ये मजेदार चुटकुले.> लड़की का एक्सीडेंट हो गया.डॉक्टर - आपके पैर खराब हो गए हैं.लड़की - क्या ये सही नहीं होंगे?डॉक्टर - नहीं इनको काटना पड़ेगा.लड़की - ओह! नो अब मैं क्या करुंगी?डॉक्टर - धीरज रखिए, ईश्वर सब ठीक करेगा.लड़की - अरे मुझे उसकी टेंशन नहीं है. दरअसल मैंने कल ही नया सैंडल खरीदा है, और उस दुकान पर लिखा था- "बिका माल वापस नही…